HISTORICAL HEAD COACH SIGNING
News from Colton shocks the league as Coach Michael Soliman has been fired by General Manager Rober Pelinka before the start of the 2024-2025 Season, and demoted to 5th string Small Forward. Soliman has led the team to multiple playoff appearances but just couldn't get deep enough into the post-season to satisfy Rober's expectations. The team made history on March 25, 2024 by agreeing to sign rookie coach John Bishay to a 4 year $50million contract. This is the first time in league history that a player and coach have swapped positions. Bishay, whose career has been tragically cut short due to injuries, was considered one of the best big men in the league in his prime, leading the league in rebounds for two consecutive seasons and winning one DPOY. As the youngest coach in the league, Bishay is looking to give the Miracle Makers an extra spark to make a deep playoff run. Rumors are also circulating that the Miracle Makers are looking to sign two young players in free agency, but those rumors have yet to be confirmed. It is still too early to tell how Coach Bishay will mesh with all of the personalities in the locker room and whether he can keep Lebron Tanios happy enough to re-sign with the team during next year's off season.
MVP Candidate looks to carry team to a 4th straight First-Round Exit
Superstar Center John Bishay hits the gym for the first time this season, looking to assure another first round exit. Leading the league in points, rebounds, assists, rebounds, blocks, steals, and field goal percentage, Bishay seems focused on his goal. "I have been trained in a culture that encourages first round exits, since my rookie years following in the footsteps of legends John Soliman and Bishoy Hanna, to watching them make a first round exit this Saturday, I believe there is no better way to show the league what Miracle Maker basketball is all about. In Bishay's first practice away from the team this season, scouts report he went 5 for 52 while practicing free throws, breaking many records, and assuring fans that his goal is very achievable. Accompanied by a coaching staff that will reportedly outnumber the team roster (2 coaches to each player), Colton plays the #1 seed in Covina and new GM Daniel Guindi has implemented a new strategy to try to win and keep his job longer than Dr. Osama Buss. When asked for his plans this Saturday, Guindi replied, "We finna put Rober in to break Patrick's leg, then win the ship." The game will air on Logos TV at 1:30 and will reportedly be attended by as many as 15 fans!....GO EAGLES.
Miracle Makers have eyes set on Trophy
After two first-round playoff exits, the 2015 Miracle Makers have managed to put together an exceptional roster that has their animated fans crossing their fingers. Led by novice Head Coach Kerolos Sorial, the team hopes to launch a deep playoff run for the first time in Colton history. The first round will be held at 4:00 pm at the Cameron Community Center in West Covina against team rival, the Santa Ana Angels.
Coach Soliman returns
Following a two-month suspension for a violation of personal conduct, Assistant Coach John Soliman was allowed to return to the bench and assume all previous responsibilities. Until now, the team's front office remains quiet as to what Soliman did to warrant his suspension. When asked how he felt about being able to return to action, he replied, "I'm ready to make kids cry again."
Locker room brawl ends in injury
Sources report that on Tuesday August 11th, a verbal confrontation turned into physical violence when SG George Ebraham forgot how to tie his shoes. When Head Coach Sorial came to offer assistance, Ebraham reportedly turned violent and struck Sorial repeatedly. After everyone calmed down, Coach Sorial tripped and landed on his hand. He is expected to assume full coaching responsibilities and will be present at Game 1 of Playoffs. When asked about the incident, Sorial replied, "Shut up John, you can't even make a free throw."
Jonathan Tanios's future with Miracle Maker basketball
This off-season, owner and GM Dr. Osama Buss managed to pull off a blockbuster trade that brought All-star PG Jonathan Tanios to Colton. After this season, Tanios becomes a unrestricted free agent. When asked about his future with the team, he said "I would love to be able to return to Colton and try to build something special with the guys here, but my agent Naira Tanios has the final say on my situation. Whether that means re-signing here, making a return to Orange, or simply retiring from Coptic League, I can't say."
Daniel Guindi inducted into the Coptic League Hallof Fame
Hall-of-Fame coach Daniel Guindi celebrated his induction into the Coptic League Hall of Fame by leading his team to secure the No. 3 seed, the highest-seeded team he has coached so far. Guindi, however, was already demoted to Assistant Coach in an effort to reduce his amount of stress, and is currently coaching in the last year of his contract. No one seems sure of the legend's future, and after a long and illustrious 3-year career, Colton fans may have to accept the fact that Guindi may not be on the bench next season. When asked about next year, Guindi replied, ""Then Mary said, 'Behold the maidservant of the Lord! Let it be to me according to your word.' And the angel departed from her.'' Luke 1:38."
